Defining Maturity and Class

MATURITY

Maturity is many things. It is the ability to base a judgment on the big picture, the long haul. It means being able to resist the urge for immediate gratification and opt for the course of action that will pay off later. One of the characteristics of the young is, "I want it now." Grown-up people can wait.

Maturity is perseverance -- the ability to sweat out a project or a situation in spite of heavy opposition and discouraging setbacks, and sticks with it until it is finished. The adult who is constantly changing jobs, changing friends and changing mates is immature. He/she cannot stick it out because he/she has not grown up.

Maturity is the ability to control anger and settle differences without violence or destruction. The mature person can face unpleasantness, frustration, discomfort and defeat without collapsing or complaining. He knows he cannot have everything his own way every time. He is able to defer to circumstances, to other people -- and to time. He knows when to compromise and is not too proud to do it.

Maturity is humility. It is being big enough to say, "I was wrong." And, when he is right, the mature person need not experience the satisfaction of saying "I told you so."

Maturity is the ability to live up to your responsibilities, and this means being dependable. It means keeping your word. Dependability is the hallmark of integrity. Do you mean what you say -- and do what you say what you mean? Unfortunately, the world is filled with people who can't be counted on. When you need them the most, they are among the missing. They never seem to come through in the clutch. They break promises and substitute alibis for performance. They show up late or not at all. They are confused and disorganized. Their lives are a chaotic maze of broken promises, former friends, unfinished business and good intentions that somehow never materialize. They are always a day late and a dollar short.

Maturity is the ability to make a decision and stand by it. Immature people spend their lives exploring endless possibilities, then do nothing. Action requires courage. Without courage, little is accomplished.

Maturity is the ability to harness your abilities and your energies and do more than is expected. The mature person refuses to settle for mediocrity. He would rather aim high and miss the mark than aim low -- and make it.

Maturity is the art of living in peace with that which we cannot change, the courage to change that which should be changed, no matter what it takes, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Author Unknown


CLASS

Class never runs scared. It is surefooted and confident and it can handle whatever comes along.

Class has a sense of humor. It knows that a good laugh is the best lubricant for oiling the machinery of human relations.

Class never makes excuses. It takes the lumps and learns from past mistakes.

Class knows good manners are nothing more than a series of petty sacrifices.

Class bespeaks an aristocracy unrelated to ancestors or money. A blue blood can be totally without class while the son of a Welsh miner may ooze class from every pore.

Class can "walk kings and keep its virtue and talk with crowds and keep the common touch." Everyone is comfortable with the person who has class because he is comfortable with himself.

Author Unknown

I don't recall how long ago, or where, for that matter, I came upon these two meditations. However, their message is timeless!

To me, both of these traits, maturity and class, go hand in hand. I think a mature person is one that is comfortable in their own skin. Thus, this type of individual attracts classy people toward them because they radiate class!

These reflections serve as personal benchmarks for me to rate myself from time to time and through the different stages of my life. Am I the same person today as I once was when I was 8? 16? 25? or even a few years back at 40? I sure hope not! I hope I have grown through the various mistakes I have made by not repeating them. However, the ones I have repeated, I know I need to work harder to eliminate them from my continued personal and spiritual development. It is only through humility, combined with the grace of God, can I find the courage to surrender these detrimental behaviors and attitudes.

It boils down to one word ... choices! "Knowledge is power!" comes to mind. The more I am aware of something, the better the chance I realize I have a choice in how I either react or respond to it.

With choices, I can choose the people I want to surround me with that empower and challenge me as I reciprocate the same for them. "Tell me the people whom you associate with and I will tell you what type of person you are!" is a profound piece of wisdom I have picked up along my life's journey!

For me, I need to remember immature people are hurting people crying out for help through their attitudes and actions. Hurting people hurt others because they do not know healthy ways to deal with their emotional pain. They tend to hurt those whom have a trait, position, attribute etc. they do not posses so the hurting person can build their self esteem at the expense of another. Although annoying and frustrating, I need to remind myself to die to my frustration and pray for these people. It takes a lot of humility to swallow a big piece of "Irish humble pie" to pray for one's enemies! And, I must admit, it is not as easy as pie to do this ... pun intended!

The most influential role model of class and maturity is definitely Jesus Christ. He constantly encountered immature people and yet, found a way to love them unconditionally! To me, Christ's picture needs to accompany both of these reflections as a constant reminder of what maturity and class means!

In closing, the Serenity Prayer (one of my favorites, sums it up about maturity and class: Maturity is the art of living in peace with that which we cannot change, the courage to change that which should be changed, no matter what it takes, and the wisdom to know the difference.